During the last decades it has become very trendy to speak of positive thinking, the law of attraction, asserting our wishes into the universe so that they come true. But what happens when things go wrong? Getting upset and having negative thoughts is normal, it is part of our human condition, what is not alright is to be dominated by them, canceling all the positive things around you.
That is why here are some tips that will help you confront those negative thoughts and avoid stopping you from enjoying life.
1. Search for the light in the darkness.
Asking you to find the positive side of a situation that you consider negative may seem obvious, and it is, that is why it is effective. The next time your judgment is clouded by all the negatives in a situation, ask yourself the following: What is the lesson that this situation is granting me? Is it really as bad as it sounds? What advice would I give someone who is going through this same situation instead of me?
These are simple questions that help you put the situation into perspective, giving you a broader view of the problem and helping you give it no more than the significance it deserves.
2. Face negativity.
One of the easiest (and less effective) ways to “solve” problems is to avoid them. Yes, it is very tempting to brush the bad aside and not deal with it; however, all of that negativity does nothing more than accumulate and follow you. Facing it is the best way to avoid this. A level-headed assessment helps us understand where these thoughts are coming from, how intense they are, why they appear under certain circumstances and how they can be less frequent.
3. Eliminate negativity from your environment.
We have the power to replace the stressful factors that prompt negative thoughts with things that make us feel good. If social media is a source of stress, for example, you can delete it or stop following people who cause that feeling. And even though there are things out of our control, such as our work partners, we can control the way we deal with the situation (check tips #1 and #2).
4. Speak about your problems and let them out.
Something very interesting happens with people who go to therapy, the answer to their concerns is often not provided by a psychologist but by themselves. Saying our negative thoughts and problems out loud helps us see those situations under a new light. Talking with someone close to you is also very helpful, if that person can’t provide any advice, being heard is helpful to change your view of a situation.
5. Be grateful for the good things in your life.
When we are going through negative moments, it is easy to think that our entire life is wrong. However, we have so many things to be thankful for everyday, that they tend to go unnoticed due to how common they are: food on the table, a roof over your head, your friends and family, having a job. These simple but very important things give us comfort and help us notice that as long as we have that, no situation can be too bad.